Democratic parenting style, an ambitious yet feting manner in which children can be raised, demands that parents and children participate wholeheartedly in all the activities. This style brings in a lot of positivity and delight in the household. AptParenting explains the characteristics, features, examples, pros, and cons of this mode called democratic parenting.
Pillars of Strength
The whole democratic parenting concept is based on:
◆ Love, understanding, motivation
◆ Positivity, equality, warmth
◆ Rules, discipline, obedience
◆ Encouragement, respect, rewards
We all know that authoritative, authoritarian, democratic, and uninvolved are the chief parenting styles. A combination of authoritative and democratic is called assertive democratic parenting. Every parenting style is different in its own way and has some kind of struggle involved with it. But what can be more soothing to the parents than the positive growth of their children. Democratic parenting is certainly a type of parenting in which the parents and children participate to the same degree. Children are encouraged to act in a way that leads to fulfillment of parents expectations. It involves directing the children’s energies into doing something creative and useful which leads to their growth. They, however, have the full right to make their own decisions.
Democratic parenting is basically a setting between extreme ends. Use of physical force is arrested in this case. This approach makes the children psychologically stable and is considered to be an ideal way of raising children. Here the parents consider their kids as equals. The sense of inequality is absent in this case. Kids should always feel that they have been appreciated for their right decisions and criticized for the wrong ones. The right decision by children invites them rewards, while the wrong one attracts punishments.
Parents create a set of rules and explain them to their kids. Forfeit is decided mostly by both the parents and kids together. This type of parenting gives the children a sense of belonging to their parents and household. They feel they are truly valued by their parents. In a nutshell, the entire concept of democratic parenting is that the kids as well as parents have a fixed set of rights and privileges. The effects of democratic parenting are more profound than any other type of parenting.
Characteristics and Features
◆ In this type of parenting, parents instruct as to how the kid must behave. However, the liberty of choice or decision-making rests with the kids.
◆ It helps in the psychological adjustment of children.
◆ This type mainly deals with choices. Children can choose from the options available and act accordingly.
◆ It involves communicating ideas and feelings between parents and children.
◆ In this parenting style, children and parents must be united for the whole style to work positively.
◆ This parenting style demands commitment on the part of parents.
◆ In this case, the child exercises control over his decisions to some extent. Parents don’t dictate things to their child.
◆ It demands consistency amongst the parents and the child when it comes to their relationship.
◆ It involves the making of rules by the parents. These rules are then explained to the children in a subtle manner.
◆ Each violate of rule invites some kind of punishment. This may be decided by both the parents and children together.
◆ In this style, the kids do not shy away from taking responsibility for their actions.
◆ It requires that children be punished for their wrongful acts. However, these punishments are apt for the mistakes, and are not too harsh.
Ron is a 12 year old kid. His parents follow the democratic parenting style to shape him into an able individual. His mother has instructed him to clean his closet by 5 pm in the evening. If he completes his task before 5 pm, he will be rewarded an extra 30 minutes of television.
Case A: He postpones the cleaning of the closet to 6 pm. He loses his extra television time.
Case b: He completes the cleaning task before 5 pm. He is rewarded an extra 30 minutes of television.
◆ It makes the children independent and capable of making their own decisions.
◆ It involves both the children as well as parents in defining rules that need to be followed.
◆ Since children participate in defining the rules, they are well aware of the punishments that follow if they breach any of the rules.
◆ This style of parenting makes the children feel cared for and happy.
◆ It makes kids more independent in their nature if compared to any other way of parenting.
◆ Children who are being raised in this style of parenting are known to come up with flying colors.
◆ In this scenario, positivity flows in the household. Both parents and children feel respected.
◆ Children are rewarded on completing their tasks properly.
◆ It boosts the self-confidence of children.
◆ Children are penalized for their action. Thus, they understand where exactly they have gone wrong, which helps in further retrospection.
◆ This style of parenting improves the reasoning skills of the child.
◆ This style needs to be adopted when the children are small. Because when this style is adopted on younger children, it is more likely that a situation can arise wherein the children question parents instructions or decisions.
◆ It requires a lot of time and effort from the parents involved.
◆ It is more effective on young children rather than children who are too small to understand parents’ feelings.
◆ It is important for parents to understand the age (of children) at which this type of parenting can be exercised. An example of this problem can be a 2-year-old girl who is unable to understand the punishment given to her for her mistake.
◆ Sometimes the children end up being too dependent. This, in a way, can deviate the kids from the tasks assigned to them.
Adopting this parenting style involves understanding that the foundation of this parenting is based on equality for both children as well as parents. Not always can kids be wrong. There may be times when parents may commit a mistake. In such scenarios, it is recommended that you communicate your mistake to your kids and tell them how it can be avoided in the future. There is every possibility that the idea of parenting in parents’ minds can mismatch with reality. It is necessary for every parent to understand what is best for their child and how this style can be implemented without affecting the child’s sentiments.